i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Randomize
