wakey wakey hands off snakey
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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