I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize
