waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
