i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize