Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Randomize
