P.S. I can't hear my feet
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize