Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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