You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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