highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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