So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
