I'm so fucking centered right now
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
