thus making me awesome and them whores
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
