I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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