I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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