I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
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