so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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