You made me cry and you don't even care
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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