Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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