I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
