turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
No...this little piggys going to the bar
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
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