So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
