no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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