Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
If I had your ass I would rule the world
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
