He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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