when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I didn't shave. On purpose
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
