Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Randomize