Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
