3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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