its not stalking. its research.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
