alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
