I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
