I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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