Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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