i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
