I cockslap morals
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
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