you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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