Cold hands, warm shart.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize
