It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize