Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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