Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
i think im in europe. pls send help
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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