So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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