Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize
