I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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