whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
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