What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
