my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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