I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
