i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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