ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
