well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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