I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
